Etiquette
Wear and Where and When ofcourse.
is the ideal place to visit if you want to be updated on the latest in social behaviour on a 
universal basis. Everybody in the Internet is crazy about it! The smooth and refined ways 
the jet set moves about:
Ivana Trump and all the rest. They can't live without it!!! You better keep a daily watch on
this section. It will entirely change your life within seconds. The most direct road to success!
People will say later "what a charming, well educated person." For once you will make an impression. What to wear and when, the simple basic rules are not that difficult!
Table manners, for the many, who need them in the
Internet.
Gossip. Who is available in the market. The best dressed
people of the world
, and the worst
too.
You will become an expert within seconds. 100% satisfaction or your money back
and all that.
When to send
flowers,
faxes and
(singing) telegrams.
Ask any question
and you can be sure that 
will always
give you the correct answer. A
line for desperate
bad manneres and mannerees.
How to cheat
with decorum and how to do damage when someone is cheating on you
.
You name it! Etiquette has it for you.
All of this told by the best ones in the field and users that want to volunteer information. It is never too late.
People, well, some people in think that it is their duty to help, or at least try to help some of their less educated, less privileged,
viewers, readers, listeners and users. Believe it or not, some of them are animals
; and it is not only viewers, readers, listeners and users but also some
(many) of the members of team. As matter of fact, it is not some of
them, but a lot of them! They are pigs
!!!.
The idea is to try to do this in the most discrete way, so that they are not too embarassed. All of those envolved in
Etiquette, are decent charitable people that want to help. Just like
Las Trabajadoras Sociales in Colombia (the Colombian Social Workers)
, they are not professionals, just rich ladies that want to help the poor
, the sick
, the
underprivileged
, the uneducated
. After all, why should the government improve the
living standards of the population? The rich Colombians want to do the job of the
government and they want to be generous and helpful. There is nothing wrong with
that, it also helps them to mitigate their guilt complexes and survive the
emptiness of their lives. In the long run, everyone is happy.
Anyway, many people in the world need help and they need help desperately. So, , the
people of , the people with a big heart like the Colombian social workers, are prepared to help them to improve thier manners. And that's what is all about. Lets clarify this, it is only some of the people of that are as nice as the Colombian Social Workers, there are some others
that are very selfish but that's an entirely different story. Here are some humble, never-the-less important and useful tips for the future of the viewers, readers, listeners and users of Communications. Suggestions and
comments are welcome:
White socks
Some years ago, during the first and glorious Purple Cabinet I (1994-1998) in the Netherlands, one of the national television networks broadcasted a profile of 
Hans van Mierlo the Dutch Minister of Foreing Affairs, a sort of colorful sympathetic character. Everything was going O.K. until the
moment when he stepped out of his car 
to attend a meeting with some NATO 
people in Paris 
. His socks were horrendous and it sent nauseaous waves throughout the entire editorial team and the Dutch jet set: the low camera angle revealed Minister van Mierlo wearing white socks 
!!!.
The late French president Francois Mitterand
was clear about this subject many years ago: "the only place where you can wear white socks is the tennis court" 
.... Sorry, this is all wrong, Mr. Mitterand used to wear white socks for work and black socks in the
tennis court 
, someone else must have said that. What else could be expected from
Mr. Mitterrand, as we all know, he was French and 
the Frogs are not the best
dressed people of the world (we are talking about the male population here, it is
an entirely different song in the female portion of the population). At
receptions, 
French diplomats are always easily to spot, because they always wear shiny suits. In the case of the late Monsieur Mitterand what else could had been expected, he was not only French 
but a socialist 
too. It is common knowledge that
the commies are not the best dressed people of the world. Everybody (almost
everybody) in was so shocked with van Mierlo's white socks that there is even now some discussion about how to approach Mr. van Mierlo in a very discrete way and offer him a crash course on what to wear and what not to wear. The problem is that the Dutch politicians are in general terms not very well dressed (there is an expetipon) but which politician is well dressed now a days? One of the few is George
Bush 
the last great warrior in that field, fantastic regimental ties, and he
lost the ellections! The only (ex)politician in the Netherlands that is properly dressed is
E. Brinkman, serious suits and discret regimental ties. He also lost the last elections, a disaster for (his) 
Christian Democratic Party.He was very much
critized because wearing regimental ties 
without belonging to any regiment. Sorry
Folks but nobody is perfect (see All About Ties)
Mr. Wim Kok the present Dutch
Prime Minister is a modest, trade union man, not too bad. He was a little to loud at first with his suits and, a big mistake, he wears -some times- button down shirts, with suits, but things changed radicaly since he became Prime Minister. However, no man of the world that respects himself should ever wear button down shirts with a suit. The blazer is the limit for these shirts. At some point, the image consultant team planned to advise him in how to dress, free of charge ofcourse, this time.
The Tuxedo Epidemic.
Here in we don't really know what's wrong with the world. For some years already there is what Image Consultant team rightly describes as 
"the tuxedo epidemic". What's wrong with you guys?! Among the "less educated layers of society," the tuxedo 
, or the end of the century imitations, have become the thing to wear at any time of the day or night! Sorry guys, you are totally incorrect!!!. 
Tuxedos are supposed to be worn only at night, during the day decent folk wear 
SUITS (single breasted Dark Blue or dark grey 
suits please, two bottons only, 
three bottons is passee, 
double breasted suits are reserved for doormen 
, 
pimps and 
fat politicians)
The film industry is to be blame for great deal for this, 
they are the ones that love to wear tuxedos at all times of the day, even for
breakfast 
. Just check out the way they dress to go to the Oscar 
ceremonies, no wonder the 
Republicans in Congress are giving them a hard time. Voor de goede orde (to make it clear for once and ever): The tuxedo 
is to be worn only in the evening and 
in the evening only.
Tuxedos and the sun
is like 
drinking 
and driving, they don't mix.
If a man wants to be elegant during the day, the best, the only, solution is to wear a 
dark grey or dark blue suit . If it is a really important ocassion the solution is to wear a 
"morning coat" . It is wise to be careful, there is nothing worse that to be over dressed, it is worse than to be underdressed. A "morning coat" should be worn for 
weddings, funerals 
Ascott 
, Ambassadors 
presenting their credentials or that sort of stuff. One more
thing about 
tuxedos, only teenagers should wear them with white socks, if you are
above 19, face it baby, you are to old for it.
Black Tie.
It is not for nothing that a black tie is called 
black tie . Black tie is called black tie because it is a black tie . For the real ignoramouses, the people of the image consultant team of can't believe that they still have to make this sort of explanations. Black is black! Sorry, we all know that there are some
real ignorant folks down there in the WWW, so, if you are educated, please don't
take it personally. As we were saying, black tie is called black tie because it
is black and this doesnt mean either that black tie is a neck tie 
with any suit 
and you can get away with it, no sir! Black tie is a bow tie with a tuxedo 
, as
the gringos call it, or in more correct terms a 
dinner jacket, a 
black dinner
jacket that is, unless you are in the tropics and in that case (and only in that
case) you can wear a 
"tropical dinner jacket", white jacket and black trousers.
All other versions of the dinner jackets are for "Lobos" 
(like they say in 
Bogota, 
Colombia to define someone or something tacky).
Bow ties in other colors 
and particularly
other patterns are simply disgusting!!! The only ones allowed to wear other
colors than their black ties, are service men
and retired service men 
, then they
may wear black and retired service men 
bow ties with the colors of their regiment . This is only proper
when the bow tie is accompanied by a matching 
waist band, meaning that the
dinner jacket has to be single breasted :
, and good luck with it, let's hope that you don't have a middle age spread or those love handles, which noone loves.
Bow Ties
Bow Ties are Gevaarlijke Stoffen (dangerous materials, time that our users learn to speak Dutch if they really want to get the supreme meaning and
message of ) few people can get a way with wearing bow ties without looking completely ridiculous. It looks OK on academics, lawyers and some politicians and 
don't ask why because no one knows. What ever is the case don't wear pre made bow ties, that's the worst of the worst. The knot of a bow tie is not that difficult to make, as a matter of fact is not difficult at all; there are different ways to tie the knob of a bow tie but the simplest is to do it in the same way in which you do your shoe lases.
But don't wear bow ties unless you have a very strong personality (or something like that).
All About Ties
The Dangers of Regimental Ties
Everybody that is really somebody must agree with the fact that the best ties are the regimental ties. Serious business, low key, just perfect! Remember George Bush? He was the best! There is, never the less, a little problem with regimental ties. They should only
be used by those belonging to the regiment or club that the tie is originaly from. Thats what the Brits say and for once they are right. Former Dutch Culture Minister and Christian Democrat Leader
Elco Brinkman (see photograph) the best dressed politician ever in the Queendom of the Low Lands, was severly critisized in a magazine articule about ties because
wearing regimental ties from regiments or clubs that he doesn't belong to. inmediatly protested! But only out of solidarity. Once again, serious Hoeksteeners consider mister Brinkman the best dressed man, ever, in Dutch
politics and love him for it. But the problem remains.The one who wrote the article for RELEASE Magazine,
Mr. Yvo van Regteren Altena -probably family of famous Dutch composer Marteen van Regteren Altena- might be totaly right. Regimental ties should only be used by those belonging to clubs or regiments. What is the altermnative
then? "Creative ties" like those worn by middle mamnagement and president 
Bill Clinton? Death first!!! What then? No ties at all? Impossible!...Not yet! Not for the time been. Not until the begining of the next Milenium when the
disappearence of ties is forcasted. Polka Dots than? Read our next story.
Polka Dots in Italian Politics.
If Polka Dots is the sollution in ties for serious people that dont feel
confortable any longer wearing regimental ties, it is important to take some
facts into consideration. Some time ago, in the first half of 1996, the NRC
Handelsblad (the Netherlsnds only serious newspaper) published an article about
the meaning of Polka Dots ties in Italian politics. The article concluded that
the bigger the Polka Dots, the more to the left that the one wearing it is. The
piece was ilustrated with a picture of
Silvio Berlusconi (see insert) sporting a tie with very small Polka Dots! We
advise every body to seriously consider the "caliber" of Polka Dots in ties, if
they dont want to give the wrong impression. What is this world comming to? One
can no longer wear ties with polka dots as large as one likes to. Let's face it!
On ties the bigger the Polka Dots, the better. All until a certain pount
ofcourse. Only until desency and decorum permits it.
Surprise Surprise!
Everyone in was surprised , some even shocked
with this photograph of la eminance gris in economics of the PvdA (the Dutch
Labor party) Playboy Rick v d Ploeg wearing a tie. Professor v. d. Ploeg one of the 5 best economists in the Netherlands and one of "the usual suspects" in Television (see "Who is who in ") never wears a tie
when comming to the program.
with decorum and how to do damage when someone is cheating on you